The Kitchen Wars: Blessed are the Peacemakers by Glenda K Clare
Marriage is not an institution. It’s a relationship.
William Paul Young
At twenty-three years, Frank was the eldest son of a three-generation farming lineage. He shouldered the aspirations and legacy of the Brauner name. Frank’s grandparents migrated from Germany to Nebraska in the early 1870s and become first-generation farmers just as Thea’s family. The new Americans respected the ideals of devotion to family and determination for a better life. As in the Old Country, it was assumed that their eldest son would take control of the family farm.
While in grammar school, Thea decided that she would marry Frank, raise many children, and become one of most prosperous farm couples in the area. It was Thea’s dream that their married life would begin and end under the Brauner roof.
Thea fixed her hair in a long braid and ran down the stairs ready to be a farm homemaker. When she entered the kitchen, she called out. “Good morning!” Memories of their first night together flushed on Thea’s cheeks.
Frank grinned as pancake syrup dribbled from the corners of his mouth. “Good morning, Mrs. Brauner. I hope you slept well.” He winked at his bride. “I know I did.”
Thea noticed her mother-in-law whirled around and acted busy near the kitchen sink. Thea smirked at the thought of her Lena’s jealousy. But the new bride failed to recognize the danger of living with an angry mother-in-law. Some situations are beyond understanding until experienced.
Frank pushed back his chair, rushed across the room, and wrapped his arms around Thea. His warm lips pressed hard on her mouth before he whispered. “I’m off to make our future, Mrs. Brauner. See you at noon.” He grabbed his wide-brimmed straw hat and slammed the screened door.
Abandoned, Thea stared at the spotless linoleum floor and made imaginary circles with one toe. “I’m, ah,” she stuttered, “I am not hungry, Mother Brauner.”
“Well, I stood here since six o’clock this morning and waited for you to wake up. You can at least eat one pancake.” Lena’s tone left no doubt that she was the commander of the kitchen. A plate of three pancakes were slammed onto the table. “There, eat.”
“Yes, Mother Brauner.” The pancakes and syrup were still warm and tasty. But while Lena’s dark eyes peered at her, swallowing each mouthful was a struggle. Unexpectedly homesick, Thea’s lower lip quivered. Don’t you cry! You’re no longer a little girl! Thea thought small talk might ease the tension. “Did you have fun at the reception last night?”
Lena grunted. “Of course.” Then continued silence. Lena Brauner’s usual attire — an ankle-length dress of dark cotton or wool — made her appear unyielding and intimidating. Adding to her dark persona, Lena pulled her dull brownish hair into a tight knot at the top of her head.
Lena swung around and faced her new daughter-in-law. “I’m not your mother so don’t call me that.” Her sneer was undeniable. “Call me Lena, if you have to call me anything.” She turned her back and continued washing the dishes.
The newest member of the family sat stunned. What did I do? She must be tired. The thought of living under the same roof as Lena — each long day and every short night — made Thea’s stomach churn. Panic crept into her mind. No one has ever talked so mean to me like that. Loud ticking of a Bavarian cuckoo clock on the wall reverberated and shattered the oppressive impasse. Each shrill chirp from the wooden bird startled Thea’s heart. You were warned that she wasn’t the warmest person.
Thea’s best friend, Elise Hopkins, expressed everyone’s opinion. “I wouldn’t want to be Lena Brauner’s daughter-in-law for all the Franks in the world.” So, what did I expect? Thea’s mother — who never spoke badly about anyone — was asked of her impression of Lena. “Well, she’s a formidable woman, for sure. But Thea, you can always count on me for support.”
The plain and simple truth was that Thea loved Lena’s son, and they were now married. Whether fear, doubt, or regret sang dirges in her head, there were no escape options. Before any more spiteful words were shared, the kitchen screened door slammed.
“Thea, good morning!” Frank’s fifteen-year-old sister, Helen, rushed into the kitchen with an egg basket. She smelled of dusty straw and chicken manure. “Hey, you want a tour of the farm place?” Before Lena barked any orders, the sisters-in-law scrambled out of the kitchen door.
Helen pulled Thea around to the front of the two-and-one-half story house. “My grandparents bought this house from the Sears catalog for two thousand dollars. The package had blueprints including building materials. “Can you imagine? It’s called an American Four-square style because each floor is arranged in four square rooms. There’s two more rooms in the attic for junk and my toys.” The two young women stared up at the house. “Look, those windows are my bedroom!” Helen giggled.
Helen sat down on the steps to the wide porch which wrapped around the western and southern sides. “On Tuesday and Friday nights, our family sits out here together and talks. Father expects it. Kinda like church.”
“Oh, that’s nice.” Thea wondered what happened if someone didn’t attend.
Helen grabbed Thea’s hand and squeezed. “But now I can sit with you. We can be sisters. What do you think?”
“Of course we will. I never had a sister, so you’ll be perfect.”
Helen glanced at the window and lowered her voice. “Mother isn’t any fun.” Helen picked at her hands. “I shouldn’t talk about my mother, but you’ll find out anyway.” She sucked on a torn fingernail. “Seems I irritate her, so I stay out of her way.”
“Oh, you don’t seem the type to irritate people.”
“Mother wasn’t always so mean and frustrated. When I was five years old, she laughed and sang.” Helen’s voice fell again. “Then she just changed. I don’t know what happened. But she started biting at Father and the rest of us.”
“She’s mean to everyone?” Thea couldn’t imagine Meta using harsh words.
Helen shrugged. “Yeah, I guess.” Helen’s eyes looked back at the kitchen door. “Just remember that her moods can be fickle and unpredictable. She measures a person’s actions and then allows her anger to fester like a wound.”
Thea felt a shudder run over her body. I wondered what rules I’ve broken.
“Always be careful. She saves her criticism in her secret pocket and then trips you up later.”
Helen’s pain seemed genuine, and Thea didn’t know how to respond. Thea was born much later than her brothers, so her parents coddled her. She didn’t remember being spanked or scolded.
***
By the time the young women returned to the kitchen, the newest member of the Brauner family formulated three major decisions. Like the Ten Commandments, she needed to seal them into her heart and mind.
First, Thea needed caution when working in the kitchen — Lena’s domain. Not a good cook nor kitchen helper, she’d watch and learn so that there would be no saved-up criticism.
Second if Lena found her own daughter irritating, she’d certainly feel the same about her. Thea decided that common ground — a project for the two to come together — was needed. I must think before I speak. Boy, that’s gonna be hard.
Last and most important, the new wife knew failure of her marriage was not an option. She never knew anyone who had divorced. She would learn to live in harmony with Frank and all his family — especially Lena. Thea inhaled deep and emitted a long sigh. I have a lot to learn. Thea knew she needed to ask for God’s help and then listen to His advice!
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